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You've heard about my glorious tales of triumph and filth for over a month now. Let me hear what kind of crazed, deprived, horrific acts have you pulled off? I know they won't be as heinous as mine, but I'd sure love to hear about them.| Myspace Can Be Your Space, Too |
| Monday, 07 January 2008 | |
 In continued efforts to shamelessly, almost whoreishly promote ourselves, we here at ODB have decided to go forth and (finally) create a myspace page. Until recently, I really was very hesitant to get into the whole "social netoworking" thing. I don't know, maybe it was because I, for some unknown reason, enjoyed meeting with girls in person, and using things like wit, intelligence, alchohol, cunning in deception to talk them into guzzling a gallon of throat yogurt. I'd like to go on the record to state that for a long time I found the use of the Internet to track down random pieces of cum candy was a lot like using game genie on Sega Genesis- a true pyric victory. But then, about nine seconds into fiddling around with this whole myspace thing, I ran into the "profile" of this slam pig named "Tara" once gave my a backroom handjob in her mother's linen closet circa 1999. We had never spoken again after I told the entire volleyball team about how conquering her was easier than sacking Paris (the city in France, for those of you ate paste as kids), and I decided to offer the olive branch of truce out to her in efforts of reconciling our differences. Tara "friended" me back, and it turns out that she works as a diner waitress not too far from the house where she yanked my underdeveloped sex sabre so long ago. After visiting her briefly at said diner, it took about thirty seconds of cajoling before she was riding me like Barbaro in the back of her Kia after her shift. While pounding away at her while her non-slip waitress shoes dangled in the air, I truly realized how cool Myspace truly is. It is, if nothing else, an outlet by which one can find depressed, lonely, unsuccessful people whose presence was once enjoyable, so that you can pork them rotten, and promptly discard them. Tucker Max even added me on his myspace! Obviously, he's been at this game for awhile.... NOTE: If you want to befriend me on myspace, search "Old Dirty Blog" in that nifty search engine they provide you, and odds are it will pop up. If not, that's pretty unfortunate. Also, probably not all chicks on myspace should be treated like this. Tara wasn't even a nice person even when she was spread open like a cornish hen. Seriously.                       |
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